When will I ever learn?

     Falling in love is magical. Those first days, weeks, months getting to know someone new. Learning their likes and dislikes, how to go from being two me's to one us, even finding their quirks and flaws somehow cute. Some relationships flourish while others fade and whither leaving "we" to figure out what went wrong and start all over becoming "me"  until they find another someone new. Such is the cycle of love.

     But every once in awhile you fall in love with someone new and you're already in love. You don't mean for it to happen, it just does. You can't help it. Sparks fly. You don't stop loving the person you are already involved with and yet the prospect of the new flame isn't extinguished either. You begin to thing, I can have the best of both worlds, I can have my cake and eat it too. And  you know what? You aren't a bad person. You are not a cheater. You have a book boyfriend.

    Now, I have an amazing husband. He is smart, strong, sexy, the kind of man who would do any cover justice. (Don't believe me? Check out my facebook page!) A real man. I have no desire to look elsewhere, ever. But. But every once in a while I read a book and with each page turn I find myself falling. Edward. Eric. Louis. Astley. Keenan. Peeta. Damon. And on and on and on. Oh, and I can't forget the ones I've created, Trajen and Declan from Illuminated and my newest creation you will all be falling for soon enough, Bael.

    Having the reality and the fantasy is pretty damned amazing I must say. But why do I do it? Falling for others when I'm already happy is safe. No risk of a broken heart or home. No messy divorce, fighting, or pain all while experiencing the fun emotions, the rush of endorphins, every pleasurable sensation that is associated with love. I get to imagine myself in the heroine's place and go through everything she does including each and every aspect of her romantic life. The initial uncertainty of a burgeoning interest, a casual touch- or was it intentional? And then finally, the moment we all wait for with nervous anticipation, holding our breaths, knowing what is coming in the next few sentences. Our hearts skip a beat, our stomachs knot and fill with butterflies, we begin to shake slightly, and our pulses race as we await the big moment. The first of what we hope to be many kisses.

     And the only thing better than falling in love with the character someone else created is falling in love with one you have created yourself. When I began describing Declan and Trajen for my first novel it was as if I could craft the perfect guys, my perfect guys. They are opposite in so many ways but both good. I realized I could put every quality I adored in a man or teenager into each of them and add a few flaws to make them real. They both have a bit of my husband, Jamie, in each of them, Declan has Jamie's athleticism, boyish charm, his bravery. Trajen embodies his intelligence, his mannerisms, his loyalty and strength. They both have some of his physical features but neither are totally Jamie, just bits and pieces of the man I love mixed with other traits, attributes, and characteristics that became two impressive book boyfriends that I had to share with the rest of you.

     When it was time to come up with a leading man for my newest work in progress I went back to the theoretical drawing board. Inspiration for him came from all over. I began researching men, beautiful men, who would captivate women. Actors, cowboys, models, firefighters, singers, policemen, artists, chefs, athletes, business men, construction workers, soldiers, and everyone in between inspired my newest fantasy. The only thing missing was his name. He had a dark side so any old name wouldn't do. When I found the name Bael I knew it was his. Bael is sexy, gorgeous, mysterious, and when he meets Grayson they bring each other back to life. There's just one problem left to overcome, his past. His darkness. Who isn't drawn to a bad boy? After all, a healthy does of danger is a major turn on, especially when you are completely secure in a marriage where the riskiest thing one might face is having a quickie without the kids catching you.

     I don't know why everyone else falls for their book boyfriends but for me it is the same as my husband watching a naughty movie- it fulfills a fantasy, fuels my passions, and keeps inspiration flowing. I cherish the memories of when I first started dating Jamie, of our first kiss, of the first time he told me he loved me. When I think back to those moments I still get a lovely ache in my naughty bits, err the warm fuzzies. Yeah, that's better. Either way, I doubt I will ever have another first kiss, another first date, another first anything but in my books I get to experience it right along with the characters and fall in love with them. For me, that's the next best thing.

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I'm giving away an e-copy of Illuminated for this blog hop. For a chance to win you must comment on this post and like my facebook page or follow me on twitter. If you have already liked my page (or followed me) then you only need to comment on this post. Make sure you include which social media format you chose in your comment. Follow me @gretch_roberts. Deadline to enter is May 18th at midnight. Winner will be chosen at random after May 19th and will be notified by social media format listed. Thanks for stopping by and visiting my twisted reality.